Things in My Control
It’s easy to get caught up in thinking about the past or worrying about the future, especially when life feels overwhelming. Our minds naturally want to revisit what’s already happened or anticipate what might come next, but this type of thinking often creates unnecessary stress. The truth is, while the past is behind us and the future hasn’t arrived, the present is the only time we have any real control over. Learning how to stay grounded in the moment is key to managing mental well-being and reducing anxiety.
Reflecting on the past can serve a purpose, particularly when it helps us learn from our experiences. However, there’s a fine line between healthy reflection and becoming stuck in regret or guilt. Many of us find ourselves replaying moments we wish we could change, or thinking about the “what ifs” of our lives. This can become a mental trap, as no amount of rumination will undo what’s already been done. What’s crucial is to recognize that while we cannot change the past, we can choose how we respond to it in the present. This shift in thinking allows us to grow and move forward rather than staying tethered to mistakes or missed opportunities. The past holds lessons, but it doesn’t have to hold us back.
Similarly, trying to control the future can often lead to anxiety. We’re hardwired to want certainty, and it’s natural to want to anticipate what’s coming so we can prepare for it. However, the future is inherently unpredictable, and attempting to control it can result in feelings of helplessness and frustration. Planning for the future is important, but there’s a difference between being prepared and being consumed by worries over what may or may not happen. When we fixate on the unknown, we waste mental energy on things that are out of our control, diverting our attention from the present moment—the only place where we can truly make an impact.
Staying grounded is about focusing on what is within your control, and that happens in the present. In the here and now, you have the power to decide how you react to challenges, how you care for yourself, and how you pursue your goals. While you can’t control others or dictate every outcome, you can always control your actions and choices. Shifting focus to what’s within your influence alleviates the stress of trying to control everything. This approach not only reduces anxiety but also brings clarity, allowing you to respond to life in a more balanced and thoughtful way.
One of the most effective ways to stay grounded in the present is through mindfulness. Mindfulness encourages you to bring your attention back to the moment, observing your thoughts without getting caught up in them. Simple practices like deep breathing exercises, paying attention to your surroundings, or taking a few moments to focus on the sensations in your body can quickly bring you back to the present. Engaging with nature, taking a walk, or even exercising can also serve as grounding techniques. These methods allow you to reset, helping you to step away from worries about the past or future and reconnect with the moment.
When you stay grounded, you remind yourself that the only time you can truly affect is now. The past can’t be changed, and the future can’t be controlled, but the present is where your power lies. By focusing on what you can control in this moment—your reactions, decisions, and actions—you can approach life with a clearer mind and less stress. Ultimately, the key to mental well-being isn’t in trying to control everything; it’s in learning to let go of what you can’t change and focusing on what you can. Staying present is a practice that helps you take back your control, one moment at a time.